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I resolve to meet evil courageously, but when even a small temptation cometh, I am in sore straits. That which seemeth trifling sometimes giveth rise to a grievous temptation.
—Thomas a’ Kempis
Even in recovery, we know we are vulnerable men, always subject to a return to old patterns. Sometimes we can understand the triggering event; other times there is no apparent reason for temptation to reappear. Perhaps it comes when we least expect it, when our guard is lowest. We may be tempted simply because we are addicts or codependents. Our powerlessness reminds us of our need for faithfulness to the program.
When we think we have moved beyond the draw of old behaviors, we veer away from our path of recovery. In saying we have grown out of our powerlessness, or that our resolve can now protect us, we are heading back into old troubles. Admitting the truth is unsettling. It also makes us more honest, more accessible, more spiritual, and more ready to deal with threats to our recovery.
I live with my powerlessness every day. Help me admit it to myself.
From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men ©1986, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
Posted in: addiction blog, addiction recovery meditations, today's gift, touchstones daily meditations
I can honestly say that I was never affected by the question of the success of an undertaking. If I felt it was the right thing to do, I was for it regardless of the possible outcome.
—Golda Meir
Living a principled life is what the inner self desires. It’s what God desires. And it’s what the healthier ego desires. Living the program’s principles is giving each of us practice in living a principled life, one that is free of guilt for our shortcomings.
Having principles assures direction. We need not ponder long how to proceed in any situation, what decision to make regarding any matter, when we are guided by principles. They offer us completeness. They help us define who we are and who we will be, in any turn of events.
As women, particularly as recovering women, we have struggled with self-definition. Often we were as others defined us, or we merely imitated those close by. Sometimes we may slip into old behavior and lose sight of who we are and how we want to live. It’s then that the program’s principles come immediately to our aid.
There is no doubt about how today should be lived. I will do it with confidence and joy.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
Posted in: addiction recovery meditations, atlanta treatment centers, purple residential treatment, residential addiction treatment, today's gift, touchstones daily meditations
I’m a trader at heart. . . except that I don’t like trades that come out equally–that’s too much like borrowing. I’d rather trade a strong hand for a patient ear or a story for a meal: anything that keeps things turning over.
—Gordon Bok
There is an old saying that there are just two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. Those of us who are givers delight in it. We have a buck to lend when someone is broke, a kind word when they’re down, a helping hand when they need it. But sometimes we givers are uncomfortable when we’re on the receiving end. We brush off thanks and gifts and help, even when they’re needed or deserved.
Those of us who are takers, on the other hand, know how to receive graciously what others have to give; we know how to ask for what we need. Often, however, we don’t know how to give. We may be afraid our gifts will be wrong or rejected or laughed at.
We can all strive to become traders, people who have learned how to both give and receive. We each have the capacity to give what we have freely and to ask, gratefully, for what we don’t have. That is the greatest gift of all.
What can I give and take today?
From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
Posted in: addiction blog, addiction counseling blog, addiction recovery meditations, today's gift, touchstones daily meditations
Life is change … Growth is optional… Choose wisely…
—Karen Kaiser Clark
We can certainly count on change. We become fathers, our children become more independent, we make new friends, and other friends move away. When a man clings too tightly to the status quo or tries to control the direction of change, he is bound to be disappointed. We are like skiers on a mountain. We must continue down the slope. We can vary our speed somewhat, but if we stop for too long we will get cold or hungry; if we ski too fast, we may have a serious fall. Part of the pleasure is in not being able to control or predict every circumstance we will meet.
We don’t control which loved ones come into our lives and which ones go or whether we become ill or stay healthy. We don’t control life’s opportunities. We can control how we choose to respond to these transitions. Whatever happens can be used for growth and we can commit ourselves to use all experiences that way.
Today, I will not try to control change but will choose to use whatever happens for growth.
From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men ©1986, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
Posted in: addiction recovery for men, atlanta treatment centers, purple residential treatment, today's gift
Creativity is so delicate a flower that praise tends to make it bloom, while discouragement often nips it in the bud.
—Alex Osborn
A garden of flowers blooming is a beautiful sight to see. Through the green leaves surrounding a tulip we see hints of yellow or pink or red. Each day the flowers greet us with their radiant color. Yet, a sudden frost would wilt and fade the flowers.
Each time we create something new with our talents we are like a young flower opening. Whether we draw or write or sew or play a musical instrument, all creativity has this in common. Appreciation from those around us is like sunshine for the flowers. Harsh criticism, however, is like the cold air - it wilts and deadens our desire to create.
We all need warm encouragement for our endeavors, and we can give as well as receive it. In this way, creativity can bloom in our homes and our friendships, bringing a garden full of color and delight into our lives.
What encouragement can I offer to someone near me?
From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America.
Let a joy keep you. Reach out your hands and take it when it runs by.
—Carl Sandburg
There is a song that says joy is like the rain. It comes across our windowpane and then goes away again. When joy comes knocking at our window we can reach out and let it in. Joy comes to us in many ways - through deep laughter, through games played together in a spirit of fun and sharing. Singing together, skating, and being around a campfire are all ways we share joy. Yet joy can also be felt alone.
Each moment of joy we reach for strengthens our spirits. Joyful memories can sustain us through days of long hard work. Like rain, joy comes and goes; yet its nourishment keeps our spirits alive.
How can I share my joy today?
From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
Posted in: addiction recovery meditations, happiness through sobriety, today's gift, touchstones daily meditations
The most valuable thing we can do for the psyche, occasionally, is to let it rest, wander, live in the changing light of a room, not to try to do or be anything whatsoever.
—May Sarton
A whole world can be seen through even the smallest window. Knowing this can help us slow down and enjoy everyday events. We can listen to the regular rhythms of letter carriers and school children, dogs and delivery trucks, city buses and song birds playing out a piece of their daily lives outside the window.
We can greet the letter carrier who comes up the walk, feed the robin who lands on the sill, wave to the kids who’ve found a shortcut through our backyards on their way home from school.
It is not necessary, today, for us to fill our lives with important meetings, gala parties, expensive treats, toys, or outings to be happy. There is a whole world to be discovered just outside the nearest window.
What worlds lie on the other side of my window today?
From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
Posted in: happiness through sobriety, live life drug free, overcoming obstacles to recovery, today's gift, touchstones daily meditations
As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down, so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might.
—Marion Anderson
Because of our resentments we sometimes get tense. We say we aren’t going to have contact with our parents until they do something we expect of them. Or we hold out on a friend because we want an apology for an injury or injustice.
Sadly, we become more tense, more limited in our own joy, by holding someone else to our expectations. Our lives can be much richer and more fulfilled when we let go of these expectations. We can let go of manipulating or drawing forth the responses we want. Our manipulations and pouting make life too boring and limited. No one else need stand in the way of our pleasure of being adult men.
Today, I will let go of my claims on others so I can be free to soar.
From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men ©1986, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.
From the book, Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families
Friends are people who help you be more yourself, more the person you are intended to be.–Merle Shain
Sometimes a teacher, sometimes a neighbor, almost always our moms and dads encourage us to try new activities or to improve our schoolwork, sports, drawing, or gardening. Because they are our friends, they want us to be the best we can be.
Not everyone knows how to be a friend. Some people only criticize and never praise. People who never encourage or praise us are usually unhappy with their own achievements. They don’t mean us harm. Perhaps they just need a friend, too. Not only do we each need friends to help us grow, we need to be friends to others. To encourage and praise those who need it will help us in return.
Whose friend can I be today?